Susan Morgan Taylor, MA
Somatic Sex Therapist and Relationship Coach  for Couples

What is the G-Spot?

Is the G-Spot Real or Just a Myth?

Let’s get this information cleared up once and for all: Yes, the G-spot is real! 

And once you understand a few simple truths about the G-spot you will no longer be left wondering if it is just a myth or simply some esoteric mystery spot whose secrets are reserved only for the sexually elite.

The G-spot is an actual anatomical structure on your body also known as the urethral sponge.   The urethral sponge is a tube of spongy tissue that wraps around the urethra.  This spongy tissue is made up of what is called “erectile tissue”.  Erectile tissue is made up of special cells that are capable of becoming engorged during sexual arousal. 

In case you did not know this fun fact (yes it is true!): women also have erectile tissue in their genitals! The only difference in women compared to men is that this tissue is spread out among several different anatomical structures rather than being all concentrated in one area (as is the case with a mans penis).

The G-spot, or urethral sponge is one such anatomical structure made up of this erectile tissue and can play an important part in enhancing a woman’s sexual pleasure.

Why is it Called the G-Spot? 

The G-Spot was originally named after the OBGyn who officially “discovered it”  and naturally named this "spot" after himself.  Thank you, Dr. Grafenberg.  

But the truth is that the g-G-Spot ant its mysteries have in fact been known about for thousands of years in the esoteric schools of Tantra and the Divine Feminine mystery schools of sacred sexuality where it is recognized as a seat of sacred wisdom and knowledge referred to as the “Second Gate”   

The second gate, when healed, opened and activated, holds the potential to open one into an expanded feeling state of deep gratitude, wisdom, love and pleasure.  It is a sacred portal into a unique aspect of Divine Consciousness. 

In an effort to reclaim the sacredness of this mystery spot and return it to the domain of women, there has been a movement to rename this structure “The Gratitude Spot” or the "Goddess Spot" (sorry Dr. Grafenberg, not sorry).

How to Find the G-Spot

Finding the G-spot need not be difficult, and it isn’t once you know where to find it. 

If you are trying to locate the G-spot on your own: with the hand palm facing up, gently put two fingers inside your vagina and press upwards towards to  “roof” of your vagina (in the direction of you pubic bone).  The G-spot will feel a little more textured than the other parts of the vagina. 

If you have a partner who can help you out: have him or her place one or two fingers in your vagina with the palm of the hand face up and press upwards towards your pubic bone.  Using a “come here” motion with the fingers will stimulate the G-spot.

G-spot stimulation likely won’t feel too sexy if you are not already sexually aroused.  It can even feel uncomfortable or create the sensation of having to urinate. 

Most of the pleasure generated by the G-spot occurs once you are fully aroused and the other erectile tissues of your genitals are already fully engorged.

G-Spot Orgasm

There are some sex educators who claim that all orgasms originate from the clitoris and that a G-spot orgasm is no different from any kind of other orgasm.

I completely disagree with this and believe that the over emphasis on clitoral orgasm is due in part to the fact that they are the most common type of orgasm as well as the only types of orgasm to be studied by the earliest western sex researchers in part because they neatly fit into the four stages of sexual arousal identified by the research of William H.  Masters and Virginia G. Johnson. 

But just because something is common, easy to study, and fits neatly into one scientific model of sexual arousal does not mean that it should be taken as the Gospel one and only truth-fact. 

Clinging to unquestioned truths based on limited facts just because "science told me so"  is how we get into trouble and end up closing ourselves off to the myriad other aspects of orgasm, the arousal process, and  sexual pleasure. 

If you have ever experienced a G-spot orgasm you will know it is an undeniably different experience compared to an orgasm arising  only from clitoral stimulation.

Furthermore, in the sacred sexuality and Tantric traditions, it is understood that for a woman to be able to relax into the pleasure available in her G-spot requires a much deeper level of relaxation, trust, and surrender than it does for her to have a clitoral orgasm. And for this reason many women never experience a G-spot orgasm.

The G-spot orgasm is undeniably it’s own unique event that is closely related to a woman’s capacity for opening to deeper levels of love based on her willingness to deepen into trust and surrender to her own body, pleasure, and emotions.  It is a sacred experience that cannot be reduced to clear cut linear process devoid of spirit or soul.

Female Ejaculation

It is the G-spot in women that is responsible for the event called female ejaculation, where a woman releases a fluid from her vagina that is not the same as vaginal fluids and is definitely also not urine.

Female ejaculation occurs after intense stimulation of the G-spot and may occur as a strong squirt or gentle release of warm fluid.  The fluid is produced by and released from the paraurethral glands (Also knows as the Skene's Glands) which are located in the urethral sponge.

Female ejaculation is something that can happen spontaneously without effort or something that can also be learned.  For a great resource on how to cultivate the skill of female ejaculation check out Women’s Anatomy of Arousal by Sheri Winston.

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